This is me on stress. Oh so much stress. If you’re wondering what I’m feeling and looking like, imagine “Bill the Cat” from the Bloom County cartoon series and you’ll get a really good idea. Better yet, here’s an image of my spirit animal.
Pretty good visual, right? Between home building, life, work, and everything else, I am a woman on the edge. The boys are tiptoeing around the house as my perfectionism has reared it’s ugly head and I’m pretty sure the only way I’m handling things fairly well right now is by making a list and checking it off, one by one.
On any given day, I am like the proverbial duck and water rolls off of my back. These feelings are being exacerbated by living amongst the boxes, along with a healthy dose of anticipation, as well as the fear of not having all of my I’s dotted and T’s crossed.
My husband, bless him, just looks at the list and helps tick one thing off after another. He’s a keeper. I’m not sure how he has stayed so cool during this whole process, but I envy his stoicism as I know he’s as edgy as I am.
Meditation has been key during this process. I grab my zafu, turn on a brain wave app, grab ear buds and sit. There are days I sit in silence, but on the super stressful days, I add the app. It combines binaural tones to simulate brain wave frequencies associated with various states of mind. The Kid calls it my “hippy dippy mumbo jumbo.” One day, he will build a house and I will send him his own zafu, a book on meditation, and an iTunes gift card. I’m pretty sure the phrase “he who laughs last, laughs best” will apply.
Let’s not forget I am also working on my book and developing the multi-media site that accompanies it. I am working on populating the content for the site, which keeps me away from here. While I’m not ready to announce the name of the project yet, I will say it is proving to be very satisfying. I feel such mastery over the subject matter at times, and what I don’t know, is researched with ease. Well, it seems easy. I use the tools I know and utilize a lot of index cards and digital backups. It’s the modern non-fiction process.
Believe it or not, I started this on January 13th and would love to jabber on, but don’t want to be an overbearing bore. For now, I shall leave it all here and wish you all a happy weekend. I’m going to have a cup of tea, read Bloom County, and know that Bill the Cat is waiting on me to laugh at his antics.